BFM #100 - Ben Franklin Milestone
Posted on January 19, 2006
19 January 2006 - PHILADELPHIA In one momentous week, Philadelphia celebrated the Ben Franklin 300th and the Ben Franklin Mob 100th Hash. Word spread far and wide as Rash and E=My Cock Squared planned The Festivities. An Eagle Trail, a Turkey Trail, A Walker Trail, A Shot Check, General Debauchery, and - it would go without saying, but I am going to say it, just ‘Cause - BEER!
The festive mob gathered in the back room of Cherry Street Tavern, awaiting the arrival of Cause for Blindness and Nice Shoes, Wanna F*ck?. At least, that was when E rounded everyone up outside to explain the intricacies of the Eagle, Turkey, and Walker trails. Yours ever-so-truly, determined not be denied a shot check, r*n off after the Turkeys. It was simple to follow the pack westward on Cherry, to a parking lot near the overpass and the Mighty Schuylkill River. It was here that those pesky gremlins acted up, setting a trap to trip me. With a very loud "Oh, F*ck!" I hit the pavement, bruising both knees, my temple, my "in honor of Ben Franklin" bifocals, and leaving a small chunk of my right hand. A too-nice Dancing Queen came to my rescue, ascertained that I was relatively okay, and we headed off to resume trail. Thankfully, E=MC^2 found us, and clued me in that the trail didn’t split until the shot check at Federal, 2 miles away. Hmmm, I guess I don’t need to do the Turkey trail that badly. So, I rejoined the Walkers back at the bar. Li’l Red Riding Wood was there, with her sister, Lauren (?) and friends Chrystal and Sam, along with Skin Fiddle and a friendly bartender. Woundtender, too. We enjoyed our beer until it was time to saunter over to a parking garage opposite Hahnemann Hospital at Broad and Vine. There we found Self Service, Tastes Like Chicken, but no beer. Yet. Eventually the Turkeys waddled our way (Wing Nuts, in his Dipsh*t Pink PHHH cap was the waddlest. Sorry WN.) Rash had the beverages stowed in her car. Bastard Child, Big Tackle, Fur Snatcher, Hold the Sausage, Puff, Sly Fox, Snake Neck, Stacks, STD, Strap-on, Tickle My Elmo, Virgin Pimp, all drank, waiting for the Eagles to finish their pre-beer loop. Rash also had extra jello shots, which did not go to waste. As it got towards 9 PM, Nice Shoes called, relaying the Nice Bartender’s message wondering when we’d be back for the food. "There should be a group there now." was the answer, and several of us decided it really was time to go.
Food and Beer administered, it was time to Circle Up! The Esteemed Religious Advisor led the ceremony, calling various and sundry into the Circle to drink it down-down, down-down …
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