BFM #74 - Hold the Flour
Posted on July 21, 2005
21 July 2005: Cuntmo was on the phone outside the bar when I pulled into the T-Hogan lot on Rochelle Avenue. Oral Offender was on her phone outside the bar when I entered. Hmmm. Can You Hear Me Now? Yup, he was there, too. C-Mo and C-You were the only men when Rash counted the straws for Tinkerbell, Fur Snatcher, Hold the Sausage, Cheap Show and myself. Just as I was explaining that the precedent is, if the pack is less than 10, I am First In. Lucky for the rest, E=MC^2 and Strap On arrived. Lucky for us all. Ms. Sausage pulled a shortie and took off on her virgin solo haring. Meanwhile we finished the first of many Cheap Pitchers, to ready ourselves for the evening.
A huge X greeted us as we began the exercise and the hounds scattered. "On One" someone called, gathering the tiny horde, only to be followed by "False!" Solo hare and she takes time to set false trails. Harumph. Trail was located, leading uphill of course, and the pack took off into the "but it’s a dry" heat. Cheap Show and I soon formed the rear guard, with Cuntmo helpfully calling out changes of directions. Chivalry on trail. He’ll learn. We zigged and zagged in true BFM style, and always uphill. Doncha love Manayunk? At some point, rumor has it, Hold the Sausage turned the flour over to … E, who decided to confound the hounds and make trail hard to find. But, since "What goes up/Must come down," the trail spun back downhill towards the bar, past Rash’s car where most of the pack had an impromptu beer check. Talk about deja vu, yet again. "Some" of us, however, had long lost trail, missed the beer check, and fought it out the last hundred yards for the honor of not being Last In. Cuntmo won. The Mob was eating and drinking and making merry, with Cousin "Don’t forget the tailgate on August 20" It, and a too-well-turned out Sly Fox.
Pitchers in hand, E is the MC, squared, convened the oval, er, circle, treating himself to beer, again, with Hold the Sausage as the wily hares. Next, in lieu of virgins, he called on the least virgin - the one who had been hashing longest. Turns out Cousin It has been doing It since the reign of Fly Boy. Long before my day. Then it was time for the First In, Tinkerbell, and Those Who Missed the Beer Check - Cause for Blindness, and Cuntanamo Bay, who had to drink despite his spry sprint. Autohashers Cousin It and Sly Fox were called in to drink next. Violations: Can You Hear Me Now? for leaving a bad mark which confused E; Cuntmo for a pre-trail false accusation that Strap On had never set a trail; and Sly Fox for being a tad too foxy for the hash. And for having a hot date later. After this, the circle was closed and the hash bid peace, when a certain RA had to drink for telling his Mom he’d have to call her back later. "Hi, Mom!" Drink, Mister.
There were many announcements. See below.
Cause for Blindness
Overheard:
"I’m so glad you’re alive"
Filed Under Trash |
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