BFM #123 - A Pitcher of Beer, A Bunch of Hills, And Thou
Posted on June 29, 2006
29 June 2006 – PHILADELPHIA: Nothing particularly interesting has happened to me personally this week, but I did find what is quite possibly the most horrifying music video of the most horrifying remix ever. It’s the timeless disco anthem Don’t Leave Me This Way, sung in a New Wave fashion by what appears to be a 12-year-old Staples employee wearing too-large pleated khakis and polo shirt, with a haircut that does not say “Mohawk” so much as it does “I affixed chalkboard eraser to the top of my head.” It’s even more horrifying than Candi Stanton’s disco version of “Stand By Your Man” which is really saying something.
(And if you’ve clicked on the first link, then click here and waste a bunch more time. I suggest starting with Bizmarkie’s “Just a Friend” and going from there, but that’s me.)
And what does this have to do with this week’s hash? As usual, absolutely nothing.
The hash this week was held, despite rain/hail/snow/locusts/giant lizards at T. Hogan’s in fabulous Manayunk. Hashers wandered into the bar, starting with Can You Hear Me Now?, He’s a Lesbian, Rash, Cause for Blindness, Scooby Snatch, Just Craig, Hold the Sausage, and Little F*ckin’ Winkie. After some minor confusion over the straws, they were drawn, and Scooby was almost assigned hareship (Is that real word? Whatever.) by virtue of not actually being in the bar at the time, but Hold the Sausage was the one to take the bag of flour and run off. A few minutes later the Mob followed, joined by Strap On and E = My Cock Squared, fashionably almost-late as always.
Being Manayunk, trail led uphill through the residential section, then to that Hermit Lane area, so named because it was home to a colony of hermits or some nonsense. (Everybody who found the irony in that last sentence, please raise your hand. Ok, you can put your hands down. Both of you.) Trail continued on through some trail in the woods, around a baseball field, then looped back around to the bar. By this time, autohasher Skin Fiddle had arrived, so the circle could begin, led as usual by RA Scooby Snatch.
The circle:
Hare: Hold the Sausage
First In/Last In: Just Craig, Scooby Snatch
Virgin: Just Steve, coming as Just Craig’s roommate
Autohashers: Cause for Blindness, Skin Fiddle
Accusations:
Just Craig, for wearing a racing shirt and for blasphemy
Scooby Snatch, for false accusation against Just Craig
Cause for Blindness, for bar posting snafu
Winkie and Scooby, for tech in the circle
Announcements:
July 15th – Hashtille Day D’Artathalon
Overheard at the Hash
Winkie: Dude, she’s f*cking bad at hashing.
CYHMN?: How can you be bad at hashing?
E: You’re f*cking ugly.
Winkie: That’s fine.
CYHMN?: He’s into necrophilia.
He’s a Lesbian: Does pocket p*ssy count as tech on trail?
Scooby: I also sent him a stool sample. He really liked it.
Hold the Sausage: The hash is really lively tonight.
Rash: …uh…hm?
Rash: How do you know?
Just Craig: I am an alcoholic.
Cause: My little Clydesdale.
Skin Fiddle: Yeah, that’s what I call it.
Strap On: He’s big, he’s got two laps.
On on,
Rash
Filed Under Trash |
Leave a Comment
If you would like to make a comment, please fill out the form below.
