So, I could have done this trash before today, but the following things were more attractive this past week:

 

-         Beating Rick at two out of three non-competitive events at Eagles Mere Sports Week (they were the Frisbee throw and foul shooting in case you care – which I am sure you don’t)

-         Badly Swimming ¾ mile in a lake when I haven’t swam in many, many years and also after many, many years picking up a Tennis racket and losing to 60 year olds

-         Listening to extended family members repeat stories over and over again until all you can do is nod and stare blankly (kinda like the hash)

-         Getting lost in the woods after hiking a five mile trail and being saved by forest rangers.

 

Son of a Goat Fucker offered to write trash and I didn’t take him up on the offer. Next time… I definitely will…

 

Who appeared on this sultry night to tackle Spruce Hill and UCity:

Son of a Goat Fucker, Lick Hymen, Plastic Pud, Just Bridget, Mr Snuff my Something, Cousin It, Just Alice, Just Megan, Sloppy Ho, Anal Proboner, Two Clump Chump, Popeye’s Biatch, Mayor Quimby, Soft Core Anal-ist, Rash, Holy Fuck, Stacks, Skin Fiddle, Big Tackle, Just Alexandra, Cunting Season, Tastes Like Chicken, Jingle Balzzz, Nappy Headed Ho, Likes the Hard One, Just Jackie, Rear Engineer, Just Timo, Little F-ing Winkie, Just Brian, Hold the Sausage, Well Hung Jury, and the people who were there but I couldn’t read my handwriting…

 

 

The trail started out down 45^th street towards Locust St. From there, we went past the Rotunda on 40^th st and headed East. At some point, I got tired and was lazy and started walking back to the bar with Hold the Sausage. We had the bright idea to try to find the beer check, which we knew was a few blocks from the bar. The other bright idea was to follow the trail backward to find the beer check. We picked up Mayor Quimby on the way. After a while of casing nearby blocks, we were unable to find beer. Some of the Spruce Hill neighbors were concerned about us being lost… but alas, they could not lead us to beer…

 

With a nose for beer, the pack generally makes it back to the bar….eventually…

 

We collected the hash cash and started dolling out beer. The circle started shortly thereafter and this is what I remember or could read from my handwriting:

 

Hare: Likes the Hard One

 

Virgins:

Just Jackie – Likes the Hard One made her cum – do we have photographic evidence??

Just Laura – Rear Engineer swears he never made her cum

Just Timo – Just Alexandra made her cum

 

First In – Anal Proboner

Last In – Big Tackle (must have actually ran the rest of the trail after the beer check)

 

Autohashers – Mayor Quimby, Skin Fiddle, Mr Snuff my Something, Lick Hymen

 

Long Time No See’ers – Tastes Like Chicken, Winkie, Stacks

 

 

Nappy Headed accused Just Megan of having new shoes

 

Winkie accused Just Anastasia of falling on a small crack

 

Well Hung Jury accused Lick Hymen/Mango of having too many buttons unbuttoned on his shirt

 

Someone accused Heave Ho of not pooping in the bathroom since it was too dirty

 

Winkie accused Hold the Sausage of having a wonder womyn costume on…

 

Sloppy Ho was accused of not being at the last hash or I think any of us crazy mismanagement…

 

Then we were made aware of the side-sides…

 

Anal ProBoner

Soft Core Anal-ists

 

More autohashers – Fruit of the Clue and Scooby Snatch

 

 

Sloppy opened the floor to name Just Alice

 

We learned the following things about Just Alice:

She loves $1 tacos and she likes to smell her fingers after

She grew up in Drexel Hill

She went to the University of the Sciences

She sells drugs for a living

Her favorite animal is a donkey

Her favorite position is from behind

She likes to fall down

She was Mary Of Dunlar in an Irish Pageant

 

The potential names came in:

Little Miss from Behind

Little Miss Crack Addict

Sloppy Ass Kisser

Fish Taco

Pink Fish Taco

 

Just Alice was named Sloppy Ass Kisser…

The circle was moved to the closed.. and Cause the Broken is still single…

 

What hasn’t passed yet – Aug 24^th – Full Moon – check your e-mail

Phillies Tailgate 2008 – Date TBD

 

Other stuff happened but not too much….

 

The Kazachs danced to the tunes

Jingle Balzzz was chased with handcuffs by Anal Pro Boner

Virgin Pimp and FOTC chatted up the new ladies

Something came up about Hold the Sausage’s tits and Hello Kitty

Mr Snuff my Something was expressing his displeasure about the chic soundtrack

 

I will leave the rest to a good dose of revisionist history…

 

On, on, YFF

 

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