BFM 237: Johnny Bears
Posted on September 8, 2008
A sparser crowd than usual gathered at Johnny Bears. Maybe it was the last gasp of summer and those hashers who have real friends outside the hash (both of them) were out enjoying the beautiful weather. Or it could have been the general fear of non-hipster* bar south of Washington. Or maybe they just didn’t feel like it.
In any case, Fruit of the Clue drew the short straw, and coerced Holy Fuck into helping him with promises to rock her world. As could have been expected, Fruit left us hot, bothered and completely lost around chickie and pete’s. Someone took this as a reason to dare Pink and Puffy to do some sort of triple jump across a front lawn hedge. The dismount wasn’t pretty, and he almost crashed face first a hedge 3 houses over. Apparently the hash needs to be reminded again to stop harassing emerging nations or this guy will have to intervene again.
For some reason I have notes about a hairless squirrel. Knowing the hash, this has got to be something dirty, but google* says that the most likely thing that I’m thinking of is a squirrel with mange. Which is dirty too, but not in a good way
Eventually we found trail, and the crowd ended up at the Blue Oyster Bar We were surrounded by cheap beer, an intimate setting, and friendly locals. I was totally ready for the bimbo’s theme to start up and spontaneous man on man salsa dancing to erupt. Sadly and predictably I was disappointed. After finishing our beers, Wood led us back all 3 blocks to the on-in.
* I don’t know about you, but google has been letting me down lately. First they couldn’t define the hairless squirrel, and then in my search for a picture of a hipster, I came across several pictures of women lying around in their underwear. I’m typing this up on my work internet connection, and now I have to figure out how I’m going to explain that I wasn’t really looking for pictures of nekkid women, but what I actually wanted was poorly drawn stereotypes. In related news, does anybody know anybody who is hiring?
Who Came:
Just Dayna, Just Anita, Mayor Quimby, Just Justin, Jingle Ballzzz, Just DJ, Just Katie, Dr Squeelgood, Just Kim, Virgin Pimp, Swollen Cockpit, One Night Only, Wonderblow, Sly Fox, Sloppy Ho, Target, Little Red, S&M Man, Cleavage to Beaver, Up her Ali, Fruit of the Clue, Holy Fuck, Can You Hear Me Now?, Pink and Puffy, Skinfiddle, Midnight Tranny, Nappy Headed Ho, Heave Ho
Circle:
Hare’s: Fruit, Holy Fuck
Virgins: Just DJ
Visitors: none? Apparently word got out.
Long time no seers: Just Justin and some other people
First in/Last In: Mother Bates and Sloppy Ho – and all the other ho’s
Autohash – Midnight Tranny to GA, Skinfiddle, Mayor Quimby and Cousin It
Violations – 2 Clump violated Can You for trolling for dates and putting his number out on the BFM email list like 15 times
Fruit was violated for being ashamed of his true nature, and covering up his shorts on the ride over so he wouldn’t be harassed
The pack then dispersed, and inhaled the awesome food kindly provided by Johnny. Holy Fuck was seen inhaling a brownie with a big smile on her face. Word on the street was that these were “special” brownies
Announcements:
Sept 11th - BFM # 238 – TBD
Sept 19th Philly Full Moon Pulp Fiction Theme – I’m going as The Gimp
Sept 12-14th PA Interhash – Morgantown PA
Sept 13th Philly Roller Girls - Roller Girls are flying in all the way from Seattle to get beat by Bumble Beaver
The Sportsplex
1331 O’Reilly Drive
Feasterville, PA 19053
5pm door 6pm Bout
as always beer and food are available for purchase/donation.
Sept 19th Philly Full Moon - Pulp Fiction Theme – I’m dressing up as The Gimp
Sept 20th Philly Hash – snared by Subhuman and Snakeneck, it will be “Conshohocken-ish”
Sept 27th Philly Hash – hare needed
Oct 11: DC Red Dress run
We have a NEW Venue
We have a NEW Management Team
We have a ONE OF A KIND Giveaway
We have CHEAPER PRICES THAN EVER BEFORE
http://www.whitehousehash.com/rdr/
QOTN:
There’s no way those balls will fit in my mouth – Mother Bates
Jingle Ballzzz
Filed Under Trash |
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Wow, posting a camment maked me feel like Can You Hear Me Now? But anyway…I went to urbandictionary.com and looked up hairless squirrel. I didn’t get a response, but an advertisement for Rick Astley Ringtones popped up. Now I really feel like CyHmN?, being rickrolled.