BFM # 243 – Sloppy Clumps
Posted on October 23, 2008
So if an over achieving ass clown over achieves in the woods and no one accuses him, did he really over achieve? I’ll let you ponder that one as you read about last week’s debauchery.
Who Came:
Anal ProBoner, Cause for Blindness, Cherry Poppins, Dr. Squeal Good, Flounder, Heave Ho, Just Blythe, Just Kaytie, Likes the Hard One, Major Piece of Ass, Mayor Quimby, Mediocre and Stupid, Mother Bates, Mr. Snuffleupamuff, Nappy Headed Ho, One Night Only, Raidr, Rear Engineer, Scamming Ol’ Ladies, Sloppy Ass Kisser, The Rash, Three Balls, Two Clump Chump, Up Her Ali, Virgin Pimp
The straws were distributed by our illustrious GM who creatively started with the fastest people first and worked her way down to Sloppy Ass Kisser. SAC exclaimed that she would not hare in west Philly by herself, so I volunteered to co, can you blame me. Normally in a co-hare situation both hashers bring something to the table. I was bringing my expert trail laying ability (feel free to insert throat clearing noise here) and Sloppy was bringing her extensive knowledge of University City, or so I thought. I turns out that just because you went to college in UC doesn’t mean that you know your way around. Any way I digress, for I wasn’t there for chalk talk, so I had to fill this space with something.
The Trail:
The trail started off heading west on Baltimore pike, and checked north through a park, at which point we realized when you are at 42nd you should always head east never west, the first of many U turns (apparently some people were throwing the term “circle jerk” around, we don’t like that phrase it sounds too “mavericky” ). We continued in a serpentine pattern north and east till we found Penn’s Campus. After cutting through the quad and over the locust walk bridge the trail cut through some backyards and ended up on 38th street. No I’m told the pack was confused at this part because instead of following the obviously laid marks to the right, the pack decided to go left. This brought them back to Walnut, where they just were. It’s not my fault they don’t know how to follow trail. Some complained like normal and then on-ined, others stuck it out and looked to feet in the other direction to find trail again.
Circle
The pack wandered into well after the hares, this is either the sign of a really good trail, or a really bad one, you decide.
Hares: Sloppy Ass Kisser, Two Clump Chump
First in/ Last in: Just Kaytie, Mediocre and Stupid, Scamming Ol’ Ladies/ Cleavage to Beaver, Flounder, One Night Only
Virgins: Just Susan
Visitors: Don’t Move Bitch from OTH4 (DC)
Cums Lately: Mr. Snuff, Sloppy Ass Kisser and a few others I missed
Auto Hashers: Mr. Snuffeluphermuff, Just Blythe, Mayor Quimby, Virgin Pimp
Accusations
Rear Engineer for using Anal ProBoner as a song book
Sloppy Ass Kisser for pointing in the circle and under when one hare, Two Clump Chump
Mr. Snuffeluphermuff for trying to accuse Mother Bates and having it reversed
The Visitors for making out in the circle
Mr. Snuff for leaving shit in Mayor Quimby’s room
Announcements
The habidasher is at it again, custom polar fleece vests, see The Rash for details
Philly H3: Cause is haring (I wonder if she was last in?)
Rutgers Home cuming, see the Mayor for info
Just Kaytie is having a B-day bash, too late you missed it
We had two side sides: Cause for Blindness - 29, Just Whitney – 21, and Rear Engineer - 37
After circle closed we noticed two long thin tables, that can only mean one thing at the BFM, flip cup. After about five rounds of that, the pack started to dwindle down. The few remaining drunkards headed out to Bonners, I mean it’s on the way.
Over Heard at the Hash
Sloppy Ass Kisser “Oh, my hand went in the wrong slot”
Just Kaytie “I never get violated”
On, on,
Two Clump Chump
Filed Under Trash |
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Umm……. not sure how I could be last in - I wasn’t even there! But it was an entertaining trash, anyway, 2 clump.