Ah, the start of a new month. Here on the initial day of July 2010, there was much hashing to be had and a good time had by many – the rest had beer to cheer them up. Historically, we know that today was the day that, in 1903 – 1st Tour de France bicycle race began – that’s 107 years this coming tour! In 1847, the first US postage stamps go on sale (5 cent Franklin & 10 cent Washington stamps, out of New York City) and that on July 1^st 1921, the Communist Party of China was founded.

 

Not enough obscure historical events for you? Oh, there are plenty more… 1877, first edition of the “Amsterdammer” was published… 1960, Fidel Castro nationalizes Shell & Texaco gas stations in Cuba… 1993, 1 second is added to the clock… 1982, Over 2000 Unification Church couples marry at NY MSG… 1963, ZIP Codes are introduced for United States mail… and lastly but not least, in 1776, there was the first vote on the Declaration of Independence (this is Philadelphia, you know). And there to celebrate such an epic day, was Cause for Blindness, Son of Goatf*cker, The S & M Man, Cousin It, Little F*cking Winkie, Short Distance Rimmer, Flounder, Gag Reflex, Where’s my Vagina?, Mr. Snuffleupamuff, Hold the Sausage, Is That a Penis? and her virgin Just Tony, Rear Engineer, Up Her Alley, Broken Rod, Sleeps Around the C*ck, Itemized Seduction, Softcore Analist, Two Clump Chump, and those who wished not to participate fully by autohashing, One Inch In, Midnight Tranny to Georgia, Snap Off, Seiz’er TiTs, and Virgin Pimp.

 

Circle

Hare: Rear Engineer

…Not enough urine in the parking structure..

…not enough people making out by the river…

…not enough miles before the beer check…

Virgins: Just Tony ala Is That a Penis? (Penis? made him cum and he’s embarrassed…)

First/Last In: Seiz’er TiTs, Softcore Analist, and Up Her Ali

Cums Latlies: Little F*cking Winkie, Cousin It (for his one month per year, to promote the tailgate), Is That a Penis?, Virgin Pimp, Up Her Ali, and Broken Rod

Autohashers: One Inch In, Midnight Tranny to Georgia, Snap Off, Seiz’er TiTs, and Virgin Pimp.

 

Accusations

For something that happened in Canada…and because Tube C*ck isn’t around, anyone who has ever been to Canada was told to drink.

…and because this was a lame accusation and would have been a social, it was deemed false and the mob moved on.

For not properly instructing her virgin, Just Tony, about how not to point in circle: Is That a Penis?

…and Snap Off for the “When one Russian drinks…” rule (is that a new rule?)

…and Virgin Pimp because something happened with a virgin.

For being confused and wearing a green dress, without it being green dress: Hold the Sausage

…which was deemed a false accusation by Two Clump Chump, though no one drank for it.

For dropping a beer at the beer check, which is full fledged alcohol abuse: Midnight Tranny to Georgia

For scaring Snap Off’s pussy into hiding at Tuesday’s PH3 – and something about it being engorged into hiding…and an entire batch of hot dogs: Itemized Seduction

For eating in circle: The S & M Man, Is That a Penis?, and Just Tony

…and Snap Off for the “When one Russian drinks…” rule

…then something about one girl who doesn’t swallow by Little F*cking Winkie – not really worth adding….

For squealing like a little girl when he almost got pants’ed: Rear Engineer

For racing to coming in almost after Cause for Blindness: Grab My Handlebars

For sleeping with Snap Off tonight: Is That a Penis?

…but because they accused themselves of it, they both drank.

…and then Rear Engineer actually got pants’ed

For making condoms, uh, he meant contact with Rear Engineer’s butt: Short Distance Rimmer

…but Virgin Pimp drank because he messed up the accusation and because it was acceptable hash behavior

…and then there was a motion to ban Snap Off from making accusations in circle, but it was unclear who would be ordained to make such a motion (apparently we didn’t have a GM present, I mean, other than Midnight Tranny), which was followed by a ban on all accusations made by Russians

For asking to live in the basement of a church just to be able to have sex (with Priests?): Little F*cking Winkie

…oddly enough, this was deemed supremely acceptable hash behavior, considering that he did f*ck a priest, and apparently “she was freaky!” as stated by Little F*cking Winkie, though he drank in congratulations of his conquest(s)

 

Announcements

Up Her Ali:

1)    Full Moon at Druid’s Keep, beverage checks and make sure to come in running clothes!

2)    July 31^st, Full Moon AGM – at the Ukie Club on 23^rd in Fairmount

Rear Engineer:

1)    New Orleans Red Dress Run, August 14^th – close to 8000 people, 300 hashers and a private balcony over Bourbon Street

2)    PH3 1700, August 21^st – it’ll be a great time!

Cousin It: Philly Tailgate, three tickets left.

Grab My Handlebars:  Come one and all to the roof deck at the Brewery for 4^th of July fireworks! Bucket!!

The S & M Man: BFM #333 next week – arrive at Woolly Mammoth for group sex games and beer!

Mr. Snuffleupamuff: BFM teeshirts will be here soon! $15 for a teach shirt, both men’s and women’s cuts – get yours now!

And lastly, somehow Rear Engineer’s water broke… Hmm….

 

Overheard on Trail

“And just for ‘Handlebars, I wore a bra” – Cause for Blindness

“I bet they’d like to bend a priest over a pew” – Two Clump Chump, in light of Winkie’s conquest

 

On-On,

Grab My Handlebars

 

 

One Response to “BFM #332: Green Room of History”

1. 2 Clump says:

   July 22, 2010 at 8:49 am

   What is a “teach” shirt? I could use a few for school.