If you are going to make a decree such as; “Pack away by 8… show up after and find trail solo.”, you should show up before 8, especially if you are the hare. Unlike the Democrats views of Obama, I am a volun-sec so I can say what I want without fear of political persecution. Mr. Snuffleupamuff rolled into the bar around 7:55 claiming that he and Midnight Tranny to Georga are haring tonight. By 8 we still had no flour, RA, or the other hare. You might be asking yourself what was so important that caused our ultimatum wielding GM to be late to his own trail; well a little radioactive birdie told me. Tranny got halfway to the hash when he questioned whether he turned the oven off or not, and had to turn around to confirm. I think he was pre-heating it for Scoobie Snatch. Finally the GM and RA showed up and this week’s hash was up and running, literally.

Who Came:

Arseanal, Big Tackle, Bonsai Bush, Can You Hear Me Now?, Chernoblow, Jug Stain, Just Jerry, Just Liz, Just Matt, Just Megan, Just Nick, Lick Hymen, Midnight Tranny to GA, Mr. Snuffleupamuff, Piss Cycle, Softcore Analyst, The S&M Man, Tickle My Elmo, Twat of Darkness, Two Clump Chump, Up Her Ali, Where’s My Vagina?

 

The Trail:

The S&M Man led us in chalk talk to the audience of two South Philly women; I am not sure which group was more vulgar. During the introductions we realized that False and Back check was not represented, does that mean there will not be any? Nice try. We headed south towards Oregon Ave, and meandered along till we ended up in one of the infamous courtyards from the Festival of lights trail. We continued along and realized that this trail was taken from the Little Red Ridding Wood play book, I hope they paid royalties. After going under the scary tunnel we headed over to the stadium complex finally turning into FDR, RFK, or JFK (Elmo was not sure which). We settled into the Boathouse for a beer check. Like the ale houses of the revolution, many important topics were discussed. CYHMN entertained Chernoblow with tales of the Philadelphia Lakers who played ice hockey at Meadow Lake. As official fact finder, I investigated the real reason for the building we were huddled in. There was further ponderings into who Lord Chesterfield was. All I know is based on one of his quotes, he would not have made a good hasher; “Frequent and loud laughter is the characteristic of folly and ill manners.” Lord Chesterfield

After several drive-bys from the five-0 we decided to on in for:

Circle

Hares: Mr. Snuffelupamuff, Midnight Tranny to GA

Virgins: Just Jerry by Tickle My Elmo, Just Megan by Jug Stain, Just Matt by Just Liz

Visitors: Arseanal from Rhode Island HHH

First in/ Last in: Just Jerry/Up her Ali, Big Tackle, Chernoblow

Cums Lately: Chernoblow, Lick Hymen

Auto Hashers: Jug Stain, Just Megan, Lick Hymen, Piss Cycle, Bonsai Bush

Accusations:

Softcore Analyst for stating he had a verklempt colon

Jug Stain for bringing a stunt liver (acceptable behavior in my opinion)

Lick Hyman for attempting to overachieve by running to the hash, but showing up late

Chernoblow for offering Arseanal money for services (again acceptable behavior in my opinion)

Where’s my Vagina and Softcore Analyst for overachieving and wining age-group awards

Lick Hyman for botching a visitor/virgin accusation

Tickle my Elmo for “forgetting” to remove his heart monitor

CYHMN accused Lick Hyman for not drinking for this round of accusations

Once Lick Hyman was called into circle it caused a paradoxical circle jerk causing CYHMN’s accusation to be false making him drink (reminds me of back to the future II)

Midnight Tranny to GA for choosing the loudest bar ever and under when one hare drinks Muff was called in

Announcements

Full Moon at Bonners

Lick Hyman wants people to come over and see his balls after the Full moon

Over Heard at the Hash

MUFF “Why didn’t you run tonight?”

Just Megan “I don’t run, I run after kids all day.”

2 Clump “You are a pedophile also?”

On, on,

Two Clump Chump