As another Hash Year draws to an end, I am proud to point out that the Mismanagement has maintained their level of excellence; Bars are still announced on Wednesdays, Trash is still posted on Thursdays, and at least one of the RA’s is still showing up by the end of circle. This week at Cavanaugh’s University City was no different.

Who Came
Brave C*ck, Cause for Blindness, Broken Rod, Chef Boy or Horse, Cleavage to Beaver, Fire Down Under, Gay Mathews Lamb, He’s a Lesbian, Hold the Rimmer, Just Chris, Just Matt, Just Peter, Just Rod, Just Val, Quart, Rear Engineer, S & M Man, Scoobie Snatch, Shaved P*ssy, Shop and F*ck,69th Amendment, Soft Core Analist, Sly Fox, Son of Goat F*cker, Splash Back, Tits of Steel, Two Clump Chump, Uncle Bad Touch, and Up Her Ali.

Trail
Straws were drawn and Son of Goat Fucker pulled the short straw. Now here is a lesson for all of you new hashers out there; you are allowed to cringe when an over-achieving FRB pulls the short straw. Of course if you are a fellow over-achieving FRB, then this is a good thing. After a brief explanation of marks, the pack headed off into the night. We made it a whole block before getting stuck at a check. Gay Mathews ran half a block east and declared that street clear, while Chef Boy or Horse called on-on through a parking lot. After losing trail again, I demanded to see the marks, but the best Chef could serve was a pile of salt. Eventually after re-checking all of the paths we headed east down Gay Mathew’s street (that isn’t the name of the street, but that is a good name for a street). The trail carried on like this for some time, east, north, east, north. Then we crossed the Schuylkill, down to the path, and south towards our favorite bar, Bonners. They were so happy to see us. Trust me, despite their emotionless faces, they were happy to see us. Hold the Sausage pointed out how nice the bar is looking. I responded that it felt like a different bar, but after one sip of my stale beer, I knew we were in the right place. After a quick round or two, we hurried on back to the bar for…

Circle
Hare: Son of Goat F*cker
Virgins: Just Chris via Splash Back, Just Athena via Lesbian
For the sake of time we skipped to…

Accusations:
Rimmer for wearing Running Tuxedo Pants
Two Clump for being first in
Son of Goat F*cker for using less flour on trail than Two Clump
Just Matt for not wanting to drink
Just Chris and Splash Back for passing the bar
Goat F*cker for you guessed it, being thirsty
Sly Fox for getting engaged
Scooby Snatch for his members only jacket (to which several young hashers could be heard saying “What’s member’s only?”)
Chef Boy or Horse for confusing Salt for Flour (some chef he is)
Rear for something about a song
Broken Rod for being over dressed
Lesbian and Tube C*ck for being twins
John from Glenside of Ardmore for being thirsty
Brave C*ck and S&M Man for matching Kilts
Broken Rod for buying a new car and under when on rod drinks, Just Rod

Announcements
Philly H3 You missed it, and it was awesome
Come to the next hash with an extra $25 for the AGM, or pay more at the door. And while you are there you can vote for next year’s mismanagement like Two clump for haberdasher; which by the way was first penned by Chaucer in the Canterbury Tales. If that knowledge doesn’t empress you enough anyone who votes for me will get a free BFM on-on sticker.

Note: in keeping compliance with the Communications Act of 1934, I will be more than happy to advertise for any other candidates in future trash.

Note about the note: I will no longer be writing any more trashes.

Any way back to the hash; after circle was closed we discovered that Just Nancy came late to the bar, after failing to find trail herself, drove home. Several hashers saw her, as she was pulled over by a cop for going the wrong way down Walnut Street (I think a naming is in order there). The beers continued to flow and so did the barely legal co-eds, all in all a good night.

On On,
Two Clump Chump