Crime Scene It wasn’t the best of times, but it wasn’t the shittiest time either. It was a perfect storm of ice, lazy people (I’m not necessarily referring to myself), and a beer check that actually existed. The pack rolled out of Woolly Mammoths I can only presume a little late and sped off to try and follow the hares, Just John and Gelatio (sp?). Around and round they went and finally arrived at Bob and Barbara’s, our favorite PBR loving, drag queen raving, jazz playing hole in the wall. The pack only arrived there about 5 months late. Rumor has it the pack followed trail to a shot check at Gelatio’s house in Bella Vista, but since I wasn’t there the only true evidence of it is this crime scene photo.
I’m happy to see Gelatio only consumes shots, eggs, and feta cheese. You go Gelatio! The pack eventually made it back to the second floor of Woolly Mammoths being led by Cockmaster Commander (Jenkum Fiend) only to find me, Semen on the Poop Deck, and Hole Patrol stuffing some chicken fingers furiously into his hole. Cause was obviously last in.
Then the rest of the pack stumbled in. Those who came:
Jug Stain, Gay Matthews Lamb, Tits of Steel, Gelatio, Just John, Backdoor Deposit, You Quran But You Can’t Hide (or Stunt Dick Double ala Philly Full Moon), The Period Changes Everything, Just Greg, Just James (VIRGIN), Just Tim (VIRGIN), Flounder, Just Andrew, Silence of the Goats, Pissticide, Cause for Blindness, Commando Christ, Just Steve
Auto Hashers:
Gag Reflex, Semen on the Poop Deck, Hole Patrol, Pablow Picass-ho, Chicken Little Tits, Urine Luck, Just Urine Luck’s Brother, Just Maya (VIRGIN), Just Alper
Accusations:
Just Tim was made cum by Just John who didn’t tell his virgin anything, Just James was told to cum by 4 Finger Discount who couldn’t even be bothered to show up and tell his virgin anything, and Just Maya was made cum by her kind of brother-in-law Urine Luck. Gross. Upon hearing this Urine Luck was so discombobulated he completely forgot to tell the virgins anything about the mechanisms of circle and was promptly ziggy zaggied into drunken oblivion.
Circle quickly disseminated into drunken chaos, so I’ll give you the gist and then a few highlights.
First there was a lot of eating in circle and not a lot of paying attention. Hole Patrol, stung by being called out so early in the night rightly accused our RA’s of not even knowing the words to the very first song.
Just Urine Luck’s Brother called out his brother, Urine Luck of making his girlfriend come. Nice work, man!
Everyone got really excited about ejaculating all over the virgin’s faces, so GML had to call everyone out for premature ejaculation. Everyone's face kind of looked like this.
Song: Give me an A
Gelatio was then very upset that when she arrived at her house for the shot check no one was wearing her underpants, so she accused everyone and we had a social. She also ate old, cold pizza from Chicken Little Tit’s scraps. She was having an awesome night.
Tits made Just John drink for finally laying a followable trail, in response we sang Love Me Tender.
Then there was a lot of complaining, Just Maya pulled a Costanza (whatever that means) and The Period was sporting the newest fashion in drinking gear with a glove/koozi hand onsie.
Cockmaster is winning the Rasputin look-a-like contest, and Gag Reflex apparently gave birth to his own nephew. Scientific miracles, people.
And finally, wiith the return of Semen on the Poop Deck, came the return of the turtle neck!
Announcements:
Get your Green Dress Rego’s! The prelube is at Bonners, March 12th. Green Dress is cumming!
I’m happy to see Gelatio only consumes shots, eggs, and feta cheese. You go Gelatio! The pack eventually made it back to the second floor of Woolly Mammoths being led by Cockmaster Commander (Jenkum Fiend) only to find me, Semen on the Poop Deck, and Hole Patrol stuffing some chicken fingers furiously into his hole. Cause was obviously last in.
Then the rest of the pack stumbled in. Those who came:
Jug Stain, Gay Matthews Lamb, Tits of Steel, Gelatio, Just John, Backdoor Deposit, You Quran But You Can’t Hide (or Stunt Dick Double ala Philly Full Moon), The Period Changes Everything, Just Greg, Just James (VIRGIN), Just Tim (VIRGIN), Flounder, Just Andrew, Silence of the Goats, Pissticide, Cause for Blindness, Commando Christ, Just Steve
Auto Hashers:
Gag Reflex, Semen on the Poop Deck, Hole Patrol, Pablow Picass-ho, Chicken Little Tits, Urine Luck, Just Urine Luck’s Brother, Just Maya (VIRGIN), Just Alper
Accusations:
Just Tim was made cum by Just John who didn’t tell his virgin anything, Just James was told to cum by 4 Finger Discount who couldn’t even be bothered to show up and tell his virgin anything, and Just Maya was made cum by her kind of brother-in-law Urine Luck. Gross. Upon hearing this Urine Luck was so discombobulated he completely forgot to tell the virgins anything about the mechanisms of circle and was promptly ziggy zaggied into drunken oblivion.
Circle quickly disseminated into drunken chaos, so I’ll give you the gist and then a few highlights.
First there was a lot of eating in circle and not a lot of paying attention. Hole Patrol, stung by being called out so early in the night rightly accused our RA’s of not even knowing the words to the very first song.
Just Urine Luck’s Brother called out his brother, Urine Luck of making his girlfriend come. Nice work, man!
Everyone got really excited about ejaculating all over the virgin’s faces, so GML had to call everyone out for premature ejaculation. Everyone's face kind of looked like this.
Song: Give me an A
Gelatio was then very upset that when she arrived at her house for the shot check no one was wearing her underpants, so she accused everyone and we had a social. She also ate old, cold pizza from Chicken Little Tit’s scraps. She was having an awesome night.
Tits made Just John drink for finally laying a followable trail, in response we sang Love Me Tender.
Then there was a lot of complaining, Just Maya pulled a Costanza (whatever that means) and The Period was sporting the newest fashion in drinking gear with a glove/koozi hand onsie.
Cockmaster is winning the Rasputin look-a-like contest, and Gag Reflex apparently gave birth to his own nephew. Scientific miracles, people.
And finally, wiith the return of Semen on the Poop Deck, came the return of the turtle neck!
Announcements:
Get your Green Dress Rego’s! The prelube is at Bonners, March 12th. Green Dress is cumming!
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