This week's hash turned out to be rather rainy, but that didn't stop an intrepid group of hashers (read: dumb hashers) from venturing out in into the wilds of Kensington to experience everything it had to offer. Our ragged bunch of hashers consisted of: Slothy, Goats, Fort Dix, Sex Toys, Wut Wut, J. Michael, J. Ryan and me (GML). Although it was raining and scary out we agreed to follow what we expected would be a convoluted ballbuster of a trail laid by Mr. 1980's Neon Glow Stick himself, Pantyphyle. He somehow convinced J. Dima to join him as co-hare and the two of them were off.
First things first, our RAs tried to perform chalk talk by going back and forth saying one word each in an attempt to make sense (and sentences). As you would imagine they failed terribly. But luckily we had no virgins, no one wanted to get dead and everybody left on trail having a basic semblance of what they were supposed to do. A quick word on the marks. J check, oh you fickle mistress, how you would come back to haunt us (read: me and then me again) on trail.
Despite the rain and rather small pack the marks were well laid (or shitty depending on your preference) and the pack flocked through the streets like the salmon of capistrano. Once we were sufficiently north of Fishtown and getting into the thicket of Port Richmond and Kensington we came upon our first J-check, but it wasn't really a J-check as much as two little airplane bottles of liquor with a big arrow pointing to them that said "shots." In one of my "did I do that" moments I ran one of the shots back to Wut Wut who was trailing at the moment and we enjoyed our shots them together. What actually happened is I asked Wut Wut which shot she would like and she picked the Tangerine Vodka leaving me with the delicious, nutritious, but really just vomit inducing liquor called Rumple Minze. Yummm.
Anywho, we made it to our first beer check under a secluded section of the I-95 overpass and were greeted by an awesome freight train. See the pictures if you'd like to learn more, but needless to say a glow stick dance party and many of our first experiences as a train drifter were made this night. Next up came us being lost, very lost. Huge spaces with rain and darkness make for poor trail following, but your hashflash eventually found the scent and off we were into the woods. Woods you say, where are those in Port Fishington? The answer, I have no idea, but we were by the water. Through the woods we went in almost total darkness but for the convenient glow stick accessories we had and those lighting the trail for us. We eventually made our way to graffiti pier from the north and had what seemed like a dozen shots each of spiked apple pie while staging another impromptu rave by the shores of the Delaware. When you thought trail couldn't possibly take any longer we made one more stop. This time though it wasn't beer we were after, but the mythical unicorn known as free Wawa coffee day. Add a little airplane bottle or two and you have a delicious pick-your-nationality coffee (I choose Mexican). Finally after hours and hours the pack headed back to Luke's Bar, but not before I once again managed to snag a J-check. Awesome.
When we got back we found some other hashers (Pretty Pretty Shitsburg, Ass-Ass and McGuber) who were willing to brave the rain and they joined the pack for circle. By my calculation it was about 2am by this point so I moseyed on home for the night. I'm sure circle was awesome, but a brothers got to work to pay that hash cash. Any other questions consult the photos.
Til next time,
Gay Matthews Lamb